Nau Mai Haere Mai

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What will it feel like?

Vaginal sex:

The first time you have vaginal sex it may hurt, or feel good, or both. There might be pain and bleeding the first time a penis or fingers go into your vagina. This pain and bleeding can happen when a person’s hymen gets stretched, and some people naturally have more hymenal tissue than others.

You may also have pain or irritation during vaginal sex if your vagina isn’t lubricated (wet) enough. It’s totally normal to not have a lot of vaginal lubrication, and it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you or your partner. Using lube can help make sex more comfortable.

Anal sex:

Anal sex may hurt for the first time (and every time) if you don’t use lube. The skin on your anus and rectum is delicate, and it doesn’t make its own lubrication the way vaginas do, so using lube is really important.


Nobody should feel pressured to orgasm during penetrative sex. Many people are not actually able to orgasm during penetrative sex. Having an orgasm doesn't have to necessarily be the ultiamte goal, and it doesn’t hvae to signal whether sex was successful. As long as both you and your partner are comfortable and feel pleasure during sex, then it will be a success.

Sex shouldn’t be painful! Sex shouldn’t always feel uncomfortable or painful. If something hurts, it’s best to stop. If you’re worried about your physical health, or continue to have pain during sex, talk with your doctor or check out the link below to find a sexual health clinic near you: