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How do I talk to my partner/s about safer sex?

Communication is key for safer sex, and should really happen before you have sex. While it may seem difficult or awkward talking about safer sex with your partner/s, it’s an important part of any healthy relationship.

When talking to your partner/s about safer sex, it can help to let them know that you care about them and want to do everything possible to protect their health, as well as your own.

It can also help to share your safer sex history with your partner/s first, such as your experiences using contraception and condoms, or having a STI check. This can help them to feel more comfortable about opening up.

Make sure to also talk with your partner/s about whether you’re committed to only having sex with each other, or whether you will have sex with other people. If the decision is to have sex with other people, then you will need to come up with a plan for protecting everyone from STIs. It’s best to always use condoms and get regular STI checks.

Conversation starters:

  • Our relationship is important to me, so I’d like to see if we could reach an understanding about _____.

  • I’d like to chat about ______ with you, but first I’d like to hear what you think.

  • Can we talk about_______? I really want to hear your feelings and share mine too.

  • I have something I’d like to discuss that I think will be important for our relationship in the long run.

  • I’d like to discuss ________. I think we might have different ideas about _______.

  • I’d like to hear your thoughts on this.

More ways to encourage safer sex with your partner/s:

A red flag reminder: If your partner/s wont use condoms, contraception, or get tested for STIs, or they get angry when you try to talk with them about safer sex, these may be signs that you are in an unhealthy relationship. Your partner/s should care about your health as well as their own.

If you are needing support, you can find help here: